Categorized | Debt Stories

I am NOT a Slut, and I am NOT Lazy!

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My (now ex) husband is in the Navy.  We were married for over 8 years and were expecting our third child when I discovered he was addicted to incest and child porn.  He refused to get help or quit, so I decided the best thing for our children was to leave.  He controlled all the finances, so I had to borrow $8,000 to pay for a lawyer and moving expenses.

So there I was, 2 kids, a third on the way, all by myself, and I only qualified to make minimum wage.  I enrolled in college; I’m almost done and I have $36,000 in student loans.  While I go to school, we live on my ex’s child support (a whole 20% of his income) which puts us below the poverty line.

A little over a year ago, I reunited with an old friend that I had known since childhood.  Birth control failed and I became pregnant.  My daughter was born with special needs: Erb’s Palsy and clubbed feet, so we thought.  She is 8 months old now, her treatment has cost over $25,000 so far, and it’s not working.  She is now being tested for Osteogenesis Imperfecta (also known as Brittle Bone disease).

So now I’m raising 4 children (3 conceived with their father who I was married to, one conceived with a man I’ve known for 30 years),  all while going to college full time, taking care of a 2 bedroom 1 bath house that is way too small for all of us, and making it to all of the 3 to 5 Doctor appointments each and every week.  I’m also drowning in debt, and with all the medical attention my daughter needs, I have absolutely no hope of ever finding a job that will allow me to work around my baby’s many doctor appointments.

I am sick and tired of people looking at me and assuming I’m a slut because I have 4 kids.  I’m sick and tired of people looking at me like I’m abusing my baby just because she has casts on her poor little legs.  I’m sick and tired of people assuming I’m lazy because I live below the poverty line and I’m accumulating massive debt.  I work my butt off taking care of my children and my responsibilities all while trying to make our lives better; I deserve a little bit of respect…. is that really too much to ask?

- Heather -

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